|Link to Mail on Sunday|
"MPs hurled foul-mouthed insults at each other, during a boozy £3,000 banquet in front of Army chief General Sir Peter Wall.
"Labour MPs staged a walkout after [Hendon] Tory MP Matthew Offord called one of them a 'gobshite' and another a 'prat'.
"... The MPs did not have to pay a penny for the £60-a-head banquet, organised by the UK Defence Forum for the All Party Parliamentary Armed Forces Group, which is funded by donations from top defence firms, including BAE Systems."
Matthew Offord MP and Maximus
"Microchipped and friendly travelling companion on the Northern Line.
Each day I meet tourists, school children and other commuters,
who talk to Matthew and stroke me."